I don’t celebrate Easter. I don’t dye eggs, I don’t make — or buy — baskets filled with goodies, I don’t read online about the Easter bunny and I haven’t dressed up on an Easter Sunday in years. I don’t even acknowledge it’s holiday.
I grew up in an old-school New Britain Catholic School. We got our ashes on Ash Wednesday, gave up something for Lent, went to confession, picked up palms on Palm Sunday and ate fish on Fridays.
As I kid I remember it always raining on Good Friday and sunny on Easter Sunday. Good Friday was a day we mourned and on Sunday we’d rejoice.
Easter used to be an event. Better than Christmas in a different kind of way. While my mother always made Christmas magical, there were no gifts on Easter morning. And I was okay with that. Easter was about faith. It was the promise of something new – a rebirth.
As an adult, I have lost touch with the Catholic church.
I know Lent begins when I see friends drop off Facebook – some make grand announcements of their 40 days of self-denial. — Yeah, I couldn’t give up social media 40 days.– And I only know Easter is this week because of Pinterest and Instagram.
I haven’t been a practicing Catholic in decades, yet there is a part of me that feels guilty at this time of year. Religion and holidays were such a huge part of my upbringing.
My mom recently passed Mother always went to church. She brought me Holy Water in a jar and Palms to hang over my door. I allow her to do these things for me even though I’ve chosen to step away from the Church.
I think there’s a small part of me that appreciated the connection.
If I do something special – it’s because I want to, there’s no religious obligation. It’s because I still think of Easter as the promise of something new and a chance to start over.
I don’t have to believe in the church or even be a practicing Catholic. I let my deceased mother help me with that.
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